i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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