When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
