Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize
