i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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