didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
