the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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