I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
