Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize