She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
