Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
