I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
no you cant smoke seaweed
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize