There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
