I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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