I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
