and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Someone came in the potted fern
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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