Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
