Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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