I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
