Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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