Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
