I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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