Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize