Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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