Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
