Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
