I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you didnt know i had herpes?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
