Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
