once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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