her vagine was all disorganized.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
