how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
