Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
