i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I just blew my weed a kiss
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
