I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
