Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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