IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize