It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Rumble strips road head = magical
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
