biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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