and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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