I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
