he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
