We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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