Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
