When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
