should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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