The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
