In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
