3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
