That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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