you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
