So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
