dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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