What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
