I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
