There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
